LSA100: Trailblazer Amanda Nell Eu upholds that there is, and always will be, room for women’s stories in this world

Writer, director and horror enthusiast Amanda Nell Eu made Malaysian history by being our first female filmmaker to debut at the 2023 Cannes Film Festival. Then in a flash, her year is thrown into a whirlwind — she becomes the pride of the nation, and the voice our women desperately need.

In a film as clamorous and at times claustrophobic as Tiger Stripes, a scene that made an indelible impression on me takes place early on: Zaffan (portrayed by Zafreen Zairizal) is playing in the river with her friends. Little dialogue is spoken. The stream does the talking, a light-hearted water fight ensues, and the bond between them is convincing. We are watching girls simply being girls. There is some bickering, but this is still the calm before the chaos — before rage rears its ugly head.

From this point on, Amanda Nell Eu crafts the rest of the film like a jump scare. We witness a girl becoming a woman through a monstrous lens. In this world Amanda has built, the process is terrifying and confusing and rage-inducing; Zaffan undergoes every emotion on the scale. The full force of the body horror genre hits; hard to watch, even harder to look away. And then I think: This is the film we’ve been waiting for.

Tiger Stripes is Amanda’s first-ever feature film, and this May, not only did it make its debut at the esteemed 2023 Cannes Film Festival — it also won the Grand Prix (the top prize at Cannes Critics’ Week). The film was produced by her own company, Ghost Grrrl Pictures, which she runs alongside director Fei Ling Foo, and is a culmination of five years of Amanda’s life. The result is an ambitious story that took Malaysia to great international heights and made us proud, which is why, when I discovered that the Tiger Stripes airing in our local cinemas was not the Tiger Stripes that Amanda had intended for us to see, I was heartbroken.

Censorship — and taboos, while we’re at it — is a funny thing in Malaysia. You can talk about being a woman, but only if you never actually make it about being a woman. You must never use the V-word or the B-word or any words, really, that explicitly point to the fact that you possess the body of a woman. (Whether you identify as a woman is another thing altogether. In fact, any discussion about gender and sexuality at all is a great taboo.) There’s a character in the film played by Shaheizy Sam — a caricature of an exorcist who helps rid the girls of ‘evil spirits’ — whose name is Dr. Rahim. The punchline is not lost on me. (Rahim also means ‘uterus’.)

It may be a long while before we get our very own A24, where art-house films like Tiger Stripes can coexist with the mainstream. In any case, Amanda gave voice to unapologetic ‘female rage’ — and chose to showcase it in its utter glory and grotesqueness. We see the world through Zaffan’s eyes, and despite how defiant and boyish she may seem, it is still ultimately her own womanhood that she comes to terms with.

“We’ve been seeing their [male] gaze for so many years!” Amanda exclaims, throwing me off guard — I can’t help laughing. “We need to change. We’re done with the language of guys.”

Amanda herself is a vision in burgundy as she poses for our shoot, staring squarely at the camera as if it were beckoning to her. Pin-straight hair and wide smoky eyes, she is evocative of horror icon Morticia Addams, complete with an expression so wistful and woeful. She is poised motionless one minute, then ready to pounce the next. She nails all of the shots with little effort. And before I know it, we’re seated in conversation and I am a bundle of nerves.

First of all, congratulations on your debut at the Cannes Film Festival and winning the Grand Prize at the Critics Week. It must be so hugely rewarding to see your art be recognised in that way, especially for your first feature film. What was the initial reaction when you learned that your film was selected?

A lot of crying, I guess. (Laughs) Yeah, it’s crazy. It’s like a dream come true. So yeah, very emotional, of course — but it’s so nice to share it with the team who was a big part of it. We’re just super happy about what happened.

When I first heard about Tiger Stripes and what it was about, I was like, ‘Yes, finally!’ How did the idea of the film first come about for you? Did you always want to explore the topic of the female coming-of-age, especially through body horror?

Well, when I moved back to Malaysia, I was making a bunch of short films. And that was really kind of a return to the horror genre. I always say horror is my ‘gateway drug’ to cinema. I’ve loved it since I was 13 years old. I was obsessed. I watched all sorts of cult films, black-and-white films, and banned films. So, coming back here after living in the UK, I made short films. And I wanted to return to the folk tales that we had. I was making shorts about that, and twisting it on its head — always within the themes of the female body. I think that’s something I know very well. I love to kind of use that as an expression. And so it was obvious for me to make my first feature film about a young child and how she transforms, and learns about shame and insecurity and all these horrible things we learn as adults. But more like, what is that transformation and how do I kind of make that ‘empowering’.

So, what are some of your favourite horror films that you grew up watching?

Oh my god, it’s so hard to choose favourite ones. I love all sorts! But specifically for Tiger Stripes, we were looking at this Japanese 1970s film called Hausu, which is a crazy, kitschy, super camp, girly horror movie with lots of cats and blood. Which is basically my favourite thing. (Laughs) Another film that we were looking at was this film called Black Narcissus, which has very intense shots and a lot to do with the characters’ eyes, and what’s behind the eyes.

Tell us about what it was like to work with Zafreen Zairizal. This is her debut acting role, and it must not have been easy to tap into a heavy and emotionally demanding character like that in her first role. What was the filming process like?

All the girls that I worked with, it was their first time acting. So, we did a lot of acting workshops. We had an acting coach, Bella Rahim, who was amazing at creating this safe space so that the girls could express themselves totally freely. And on top of that, we also hired a professional sex educator to come in and really talk about things that they were worried about, their insecurities. And I felt that was very much a nice environment — or at least a safe environment that I kind of want to build on top of that off-set. It was important that our priority was their safety, and the fact that they could express themselves freely and feel no judgement from the world. Which is funny, because that’s exactly what Tiger Stripes is fighting for; for young girls to have their freedom, right? So, I think for all the girls — not just Zafreen — they all had a great time. They all let loose, they just had fun. It was all about having fun and never taking anything too seriously. This is play, this is acting. This is making a film where we’re not too serious about it, so it should be fun at least.

A big theme of the film is also a girl’s place in society. A lot of the time that feels like you’re shouting into the void, because you have to suppress a lot of things. But nowadays we have stories of girls coming up and speaking about things so openly, like Ain on Twitter who exposed what her school was doing with ‘period spot checks’. What are your thoughts on girls (and women) claiming their ‘right’ to rage and empower themselves?

I love Ain. She’s awesome. She’s incredible. And oh, yeah, do it! We need it more! We need to do it loads and loads, and throw away all this judgement that society has put on us. All these expectations that the world puts on us, it’s like — screw that! It’s okay to be ‘unlikeable’ or break the rules because the most important thing is to be yourself wholly and to stand up for yourself, yeah.

This past year has been pretty big for films centring around womanhood and the theme of women ‘coming into their own’ — I think the most talked about of course has been Barbie. What do you make of these different themes of womanhood being explored, or women’s stories being told, especially stylistically?

Mmm, yeah. I think it’s been a long time that we’ve been speaking the language of men in cinema. We’ve been seeing their gaze for so many years! Yeah, we need to change. Let’s speak a different language now. Let’s speak many, many different languages. Diversity behind the camera, diversity in front of the camera. That’s always more exciting, right? We’re done with the language of guys. (Laughs)

I completely agree! Thematically, what really struck me most about Tiger Stripes is the concept of drawing from Southeast Asian legends. Was that something you already wanted to tap into when you began writing it, or was it something that kind of came along after?

No, the folklore and the legends have always been a big part of my inspiration. Like I said, I was making short films, about Pontianak, about Penanggalan. I freaking love our monsters. I love our folklore. I love toyol, orang minyak. They’re so gnarly, they’re so bizarre. They’re so scary, but at the same time, there’s kind of a sense of humour behind it as well. It’s really, really strange. I have this thing about working with horror. I think if you work with horror, you have to have a sense of humour. You have to have this — it’s almost like a punchline. It’s actually a light comedy. I love that our folklore has this balance between really terrifying to the point where it’s comedic. It’s very strange. So, I’ve always been inspired by that, yes. My next one also has folklore involved in it.

Oh, great! I can’t wait for it. So, the setting of the film must’ve been intentional as well; it being a conservative Muslim school sort of gave it that literal cage-like feeling. And it’s ironic, isn’t it, that in an all-girls school, this girl is feeling so alone in her coming-of-age journey? Was that situation something you specifically wanted to explore?

Yeah! I mean, remember being at school? It was like being trapped. You were like an animal, like a sheep in a herd. And the teachers would just push you into groups, and kind of talk to you almost as if you weren’t human. Or at least that was my memory of what school was like. And I think what was great was to hear back from people going, “Yeah, school was really like that — it was awful!” (Laughs) And I think it was just how I wanted to play with contrast. Like, here we have this space where kids are supposed to feel safe, but there are so many restrictions to it. There are so many expectations. There’s so much pressure to be perfect per se. And then you have the contrast where she [Zaffan] runs into the jungle, which is also a very scary place but the weird thing is, it’s totally wild and it’s free. And the jungle is ruthless. It’s this ferocity that’s inside her, or inside all of us. I think we all have that, and sometimes it’s okay to let it out.

That’s really beautifully put, and I agree. And speaking of restrictions and all, why do you think it’s still such a taboo to discuss things like girls’ puberty and menstruation in Malaysia? Even in the film, there’s this weirdness surrounding Zaffan wearing a bra and it becomes a big deal among the characters. How do you think we could change that line of thinking and sort of normalise this?

It’s funny, because when I was making this film, I thought, “There’s gonna be no problem, ‘cause it’s 2023. No one’s gonna have a problem with it.” And then I find out that a lot of things are cut. I was like, “All such innocent things are cut?!” At least to me, they’re very innocent. ‘Cause this is the reality of a girl, right? The reality of what young girls go through. I don’t know why! So, yeah, I think we need to just keep talking about it, until people are like, “Oh yeah, it’s just really normal stuff that happens to us every day.” I don’t know. I wish I knew why people are so uncomfortable with it. I mean, historically, there’s always been a fear of the female body, right? Like, through many cultures. It’s a thing that we have to keep struggling and to keep fighting for. It’s weird! We need to change it.

Do you think it has changed from back then, especially from the days of the late Yasmin Ahmad, who also had her films banned? Even though they weren’t specifically about women, you know, there were still apparently ‘issues’ with them.

Mm-hmm, yeah! Yeah, it’s a tough thing as a Malaysian filmmaker or Malaysian artist, but I always believe to just not self-censor. To keep telling what you believe in and be very honest with it, and see what happens. It’s not my job to worry about the other things. My job is to try and tell a story that I believe people can connect to and is also honest.

It is really sad, what the state of censorship here is like. I read your statement about the film being censored and it’s ironic because you made this movie for the Malaysian audience, and yet only those outside of Malaysia actually get to see it in its full form. So — and I hope I’m not overstepping the mark here — did you know how much of the film would be cut, and if so, why did you decide to release it locally anyway?

Yeah, we just had to. There are reasons behind it, there are commitments. And at the end of the day, we’re making films, we have to put them in the cinema. That’s also our job. Like, that’s literally our job! (Laughs) So when you don’t show it to people, it’s really tough. But yeah, no, we had to release it. And I didn’t know — I mean, with censorship, you never know what they’re gonna do. It’s always different. It’s very tough to deal with but like I said, I make the film. My job is not to censor it. But I can say that I don’t like that! (Laughs) I disagree with it, yeah.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

A post shared by Amanda Nell Eu (@nelleu)

No, yeah, it’s terrible. Art in Malaysia has always been a struggle. It’s kind of like a toxic tradition, isn’t it, having to expect art to be ‘banned’ once they are released?

I mean, I didn’t expect it [myself]. I think, don’t expect it. I think you should never expect it. You should have the freedom to express your art and not have expectations of that. It might happen, but so what? You are an artist. You have to do that freely.

So, how do you think we might be able to balance that need for freedom of expression, with the need to protect against harm or offence in the realm of art?

There is no balance as an artist. You shouldn’t balance. You should just go all the way and be honest with it. I don’t believe in self-censorship.

Wrapping up, what’s next for you? What are you working on next?

Yeah, well, I’ve been travelling a lot with the film, of course — you know, going to festivals, meeting audiences from all over the world. So, that’s been amazing, to see them connect. And it’s actually really cool because there are so many Malaysians and Malaysian diaspora who actually go to watch the film outside of Malaysia, and they would message me and be like, “Oh my god, this is amazing to see, you know, and in our language, too.”

And it’s not just the language, it’s our culture. I feel like it’s such a ‘Malaysian’ film, and it’s very exclusive to Malaysia — and it’s being shown to people outside of Malaysia, which is amazing.

Yeah. Yeah! It’s really special when Malaysians see all the details. Because there are so many things that maybe someone not from Malaysia — they can feel it and get the themes — but there’s a subtle humour in there that as Malaysians, we get it. It’s like, “Oh my god! I know what this is!” So yeah, I’m travelling for a bit, and I’m also writing my next feature. I wanna do themes about motherhood this time. Expectations of motherhood, and being a wife and things like that. Blood, for sure.. and monsters! (Laughs) Lots of blood. More blood this time, this is more mature. And definitely darker.

LSA100: 100 Malaysians, 100 Milestones

Lifestyle Asia KL introduces LSA 100, an annual list that recognises Malaysia’s most influential names and celebrates their talents, contributions, successes and milestones. As the bellwether of style, travel, design, entertainment, business, sports, and more, these 100 Malaysians represent the next generation of go-getters who are paving the way for sharing their know-hows with the world through the power of digital media. LSA100 comprises five categories namely The Rising Aces, The Trailblazers, The Disruptors, The Tastemakers and The Navigators. Find out more about LSA100 Class of 2023, HERE. 

editor-in-chief & creative direction MARTIN TEO | interview PUTERI YASMIN SURAYA | assisted by RONN TAN & MALLIE MARAN | photography ERIC CHOW | videography SIMON TAN | video editor JACKIE MAH | makeup KF BONG using YSL BEAUTY | hair ERANTHE LOO | stylist AZZA ARIF | wardrobe MARCIANO by GUESS | special thanks SWISSE MALAYSIA